ODE TO WHEN YOUR TBR BOOKCASE GIVES YOU EVILS AKA THE STRUGGLE

SHOUT OUT TO THE PEOPLE STRUGGLING WITH THEIR ‘TO BE READ’ (TBR) PILE IN A WORLD THAT DOES NOT UNDERSTAND THEM

I FEEL YOUR PAIN IN 2016. THIS ONE IS FOR YOU SOLDIERS.

 

MY TBR BOOKCASE LOOKS AT ME AS I WALK THROUGH THE DOOR

IT SEES THE OXFAM BAGS IN MY HAND AND IT GIVES ME WHAT FOR

‘LOOK AT ME LADY I’M ALREADY PILED SKY HIGH

ARE YOU TRYING TO BUILD A BOOK LADDER TO THE SKY?

114 BOOKS AND MORE TO COME

YOU’VE GOT A PROBLEM AND I’M CALLING YOUR MUM’

‘SHUT UP BERTIE’ (FOR THAT IS YOUR NAME)

‘I ONLY SPENT TEN QUID, NO ONE’S GONNA GET CANED

AT LEAST I’M RECYCLING, AND GIVING TO CHARITY

NOT BUYING INTO THE CAPITALIST HYPOCRISY

(HEY! I AIN’T NAMING NO NAMES

BUT IT’S NAMED AFTER A FOREST AND GOT TAX-DODGING SHAME)

PLUS WHAT IF I CAN’T GET TO THE SHOPS

LIKE IF I BREAK A LEG OR HAVE A COUPLE OF TOTS

I’M SORRY, I SAY, BUT IT’S JUST THE BOOK THUGLIFE

WHEN I’M IN A BOOKSHOP I FEEL ALIVE’

BERTIE SAYS NOTHING, THAT’S BECAUSE ‘HE’ IS JUST A BOOKCASE

THE INSANITY OF WHAT I’M DOING SLAPS ME HARD IN THE FACE

I’M IMAGINING THAT MY TBR BOOKCASE HAS SPICY HOT BEEF WITH ME!!!*

I’M ARGUING WITH FURNITURE, HOW CAN THIS BE?!!!

I PUT THE BAGS DOWN, I CALL MY MUM

I CALL MY DAD TOO, IT’S A DOUBLE PARENT CONUNDRUM

‘YOU’RE 35 YEARS OLD AND IT’S YOUR PROBLEM, DAUGHTER’ THEY SAY,

‘WE’RE BUSY ON A CRUISE AKA A SWINGERS’ HOLIDAY’

THE PHONE GOES DOWN, NO HELP FROM THE FAMALAM

I LEAVE THE HOUSE TO FIND MORE SOLACE IN CHEAP BOOKS AT MY LOCAL OXFAM.

 

*Street talk for ‘picking a fight with’

 

Advertisements

18 Comments Add yours

  1. MariHoward says:

    Nice poem! Keep writing: you cd become a performance poet!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Aw thank you for saying that!!

      Like

  2. Showing a picture of someone else’s bookcase brings out my ‘I want to climb through the screen and browse. If you hear a rustling in the middle of the night, and find your books were not quite where you left them but are slightly rearranged, you’ll know I (or another bookie blogger), did just that

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ha ha I am exactly the same! I am terrible for nosing in people’s bookcases at parties. I forget all my manners!

      Like

  3. dpcinh2013 says:

    Nice post. The universal problems of bibliophiles. The TBR stairway to heaven is visible; what about the ebooks sequesterd in my Kindle?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ooh not sure about the kindle! Perhaps it builds a virtual stairway to heaven?

      Like

  4. imreadingabook_ says:

    Oh my gosh this is great 😄 And it is disturbingly relatable…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you! And I’m glad I’m not alone!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Hilarious! And people are lying if they say they haven’t had conversations (or poetry-offs) with inanimate objects. (Aren’t they?…)

    Liked by 1 person

  6. aploplexy says:

    Fantastic! So understand this life! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I feel your pain, although mine isnt as big (39), I keep feeding it by buying books every week

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’ve actually tried to put a ban on myself until I move house. Who knows how long that will last though …..

      Liked by 1 person

  8. ohkatereads says:

    This was amazing! So relatable and creative. It gives me such joy to find people who understand my pain 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for the wonderful feedback! I’m glad you liked it!!!

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s